I just have so much love for this kid…



He’s brave and he doesn’t even know it. He eschews boxes with his painted nails and love of superheroes. He defines himself and his loves and only slightly understands that he’s doing something revolutionary. Because this is just who he is: An almost 7-year-old boy whose favorite colors are pink and purple, who has long, curly blonde hair that whips in the wind as he makes soccer goals, who paints his nails every color of the rainbow and then promptly chips them as he creates amazing creations with Legos.

I’ve written before about some burgeoning uncertainty he’s felt surrounding folks misgendering him. It seems like that phase has passed and we’ve entered a new one where boldness and confidence rule. Last weekend, when my father was up visiting, we went out for ice cream. Afterwards, as we meandered slowly back home, the kiddo happened upon an adorable dog and politely asked if he could pet it. The owner was lovely and said yes and then said something about my “lovely little girl.” Before I could even have a chance to correct her, EZ jumped in.

“Oh, I’m a boy.”

The woman immediately apologized and again my sweet boy jumped in.

“You don’t have to say sorry. A lot of people make that mistake. It must be my hair. But I’m a boy!”

He said it with a smile and continued petting the dog. Remarks like that, which still occur on an almost daily basis, don’t seem to ruffle him up anymore. He smiles, sometimes shakes his head with a laugh, and after will occasionally give me a conspiratorial grin as if to say “What? How could they make that mistake. Again.”


16 thoughts on “Love.

  1. Love, love, love his response. And I especially love seeing kids’ wisdom.

    I too have a boy (almost 8) with long, curly hair. He’s still working on formulating just the right response when people assume he is a girl. His reaction is somewhere between “why does my hair make you think I’m a girl” and “why is this such a big deal, people?”

    • I have a feeling EZ’s responses will change over time, but I just love that he’s gotten to a place where he’s at ease with it. Much better than his more anxious response of only a few months ago. I like your kiddo’s thought-provoking responses!

  2. I just fell in love with your boy too. Mine, who is 19, wore a dress with hightops when he was four. He just rolled with it. I hope EZ can be who he wants to be…and to know, he can experiment, he doesn’t have to decide forever. Much love, S

  3. Where is his father?

    This cutesy stuff is all fine until he’s 12, at which point he’ll require a figure of authority to guide him. Women can’t raise boys into men, since they are not men themselves.

    I know it’s your child, but you’re emasculating him into someone who will have a hard time coping with the real world. Sounds like you’re raising him into a sexually confused teenage boy, that one day just might start identifying himself as a girl.

    Of course, if that is your goal, keep going.

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