I still remember the first video game system we had as a family. I was eleven. My five-year-old brother was in the hospital for the big whammy of little kid ear/nose/throat procedures: tubes were put in his ears, and he had … Continue reading
My relationship with the color pink is a mixed bag. I’ve never been much of a “girly girl,” instead opting for more muted tones for much of my wardrobe (save for that period of neon during the late ’80s/early ’90s). … Continue reading
I feel like I’ve talked about this topic ad nauseam. I’ve written about it for my Mommie Dearest column over at The Frisky. I’ve brain dumped all over this blog about it: Here and here and here and here and … Continue reading
The other week, I received a comment on a post that went up a couple of months ago, “Love.” The post talked about the ongoing observations I have of my son and his understanding of himself within the world at large. … Continue reading
Today, October 25th, is Orange Day – part of a UN sponsored campaign to end violence against women. Today in particular calls for safe spaces for women and girls (bolding mine): Sexual harassment and other forms of sexual violence in … Continue reading
I just have so much love for this kid… He’s brave and he doesn’t even know it. He eschews boxes with his painted nails and love of superheroes. He defines himself and his loves and only slightly understands that … Continue reading
“Like gender violence isn’t a man’s issue. Like men can’t help themselves. Like the responsibility for one’s own actions doesn’t fall on one’s own shoulders. Like men don’t have the power to change how men act.” – Jeremy Loveday I … Continue reading
It’s a new year. 5774 to be exact. I spent yesterday in synagogue with my mother and son listening to the Rabbi’s sermon. This Rabbi is one of my favorites – he’s a storyteller, weaving in lessons of Torah within … Continue reading
If you’re a long time reader of this site, you’ll know that this is not a space that runs on sponsorships or advertisements. I don’t allow unsolicited guest blog posts, and the guest posts I do have are usually from … Continue reading
Apparently it’s guest week here at the Mamafesto! But no, that doesn’t mean I’ll now accept guest post requests for “hot beach bods” or “how to get your kid to eat broccoli” that seem to clog up my inbox. The ones this week are from people I respect and trust. Today’s guest post is from my Our Reality partner, Carrie Nelson. Carrie has a new side project that I’m hoping you’ll take the time to learn a bit more about and check out for yourself!
My Label is “LesbiAnders.” What Is YOUR Label?
I’ve been openly not-heterosexual for twelve years. In that time, I’ve changed the label that I use to define my sexuality no less than three times. Gay, bisexual, and queer have all felt appropriate at various points, yet none have ever felt “just right.” The most accurate descriptor I’ve ever used is “lesbiAnders,” the label I invented when I started to date my husband (Anders) after exclusively dating women for several years, but even that doesn’t always feel accurate or all-encompassing enough. Words are all we have to communicate our sexual identities to others; why, then, does it feel like they so often fail us?
In an effort to challenge the way we talk about sexual identity, I’m launching a photo project on Tumblr called What Is Your Label? I’m looking for people to submit photos of themselves while holding their sexual orientation “label,” as well as a description of what those labels mean to them. Have you used the same label since childhood? Do you switch between multiple labels depending on your environment or mood? Whatever your labels are, I want to hear about them. Ultimately, I want this project to start a conversation about the words that we use to describe our sexual orientations so that we can understand their limitations and explore new ways of communicating complex ideas about sexuality.
Stay tuned — I’ve got big plans for this project. For now, though, I’d be honored if you’d submit your label and join the conversation!